Faith and Mental Illness…. My journey

As I reflect on my life, with all its ups and downs, I find myself grateful. I look at others and see that Allah has blessed them with things I may not have, and I have to constantly train my heart to wish them well. Some things come easier to others, and some things come easier to me. Some people are given more gifts, different opportunities, or different tests.

For me, the greatest blessing Allah has given me is faith and īmān. Everything else comes and goes, but faith is what guides me through hardship and gives meaning to every blessing and every loss. Allah says:

“But Allah has endeared faith to you and made it pleasing in your hearts.
> *(Surah al-Hujurat 49:7)*

I remind myself that during times of fitnah, not every battle needs to be fought.

Preserving one’s religion is more important than winning arguments or chasing revolutions. I try to retreat from what harms my faith, turn to Allah, and hold firmly to the Qur’an and Sunnah. I remind myself not to oppress others and not to accept oppression upon myself. I strive to obey Allah and His Messenger ﷺ, stay with the jama’ah, and constantly advise myself before advising others.

I want to be better on the inside than what I project to people. I want to be humble, a true servant of the Most Merciful, with good character and a heart that thinks well of others, makes du’a for them, and wishes them goodness.

I fear the diseases of the heart: arrogance, doubt, hypocrisy, and envy. These diseases destroy a person from within. Their cure is remembrance of Allah, sincere repentance, and the Qur’an. Allah says:

“O mankind, there has come to you an instruction from your Lord and a healing for what is in the breasts, and guidance and mercy for the believers.”
(Surah Yunus 10:57)

I also think we live in a time where people speak much about rights but often neglect responsibilities. The Prophet ﷺ said:

“Each of you is a shepherd, and each of you is responsible for his flock.”
(Bukhari and Muslim)

Our greatest responsibility is towards Allah, for He already took a covenant from us before we came into this world:

“Am I not your Lord?” They said, “Yes, we testify.”
(Surah al-A’raf 7:172)

Allah has established rights and responsibilities, and I believe we must reclaim our responsibilities before demanding our rights. We should neither take the rights of others nor allow others to take ours unjustly. But in times of trials and tribulations, I remind myself that ultimate justice belongs to Allah. His promise is true, and there will be a Day of Reckoning.

As ʿUmar ibn al-Khattab رضي الله عنه said:

“Take yourselves to account before you are taken to account.”

So I try to begin with myself: purify my heart, fulfil my responsibilities, seek Allah’s pleasure, and leave the final judgement and ultimate rights to Him, for He is the Most Just and the Best of Judges.