Faith and Mental Illness…. My journey

Bismillāhir-Raḥmānir-Raḥīm
There comes a point in life when you realise that happiness is not something to be found in wealth, status, appearance, or the approval of people. True happiness begins when you make peace with the decree of Allah and accept the life He has chosen for you.

Today, I have chosen to pursue a life of happiness, gratitude and self-respect. More importantly, I have chosen to love myself—not out of arrogance or self-admiration, but because Allah created me with purpose and honour. I choose to rise above the hardships I have endured and instead focus on the countless blessings Allah has showered upon me.

If someone were to ask me, “Fatma, have you ever gone through difficulties?” I would pause and reflect before replying:
Alhamdulillah. Every hardship I have faced became a means of drawing me closer to Allah.

Someone whom I love for the sake of Allah once shared a piece of sincere Nasiha that has stayed with me:
“If a trial takes you away from Allah, then it has become a calamity. But if it brings you closer to Allah, then it has become a blessing.”

Those words changed the way I view every test in my life.
Allah says:
“Perhaps you dislike something while it is good for you, and perhaps you love something while it is bad for you. Allah knows, and you do not know.”
(Surah al-Baqarah 2:216)

Looking back, I can see Allah’s wisdom in ways I never could while I was living through those moments. He knew every path my life could have taken and, in His infinite knowledge and mercy, chose the path that would ultimately bring me closer to Him.

There were moments I would never wish to relive, yet I would never erase them either. Through them I learned patience, dependence upon Allah, humility, gratitude and hope.
My destination has never been this world.
My destination is Jannah.
This dunya was never meant to be a place of complete happiness. Allah reminds us that this worldly life is temporary:
“Know that the life of this world is but play, amusement, adornment, boasting among yourselves, and competition in wealth and children… But the Hereafter is far better and everlasting.”
(Surah al-Hadid 57:20)
We spend so much of our lives chasing things that cannot accompany us into our graves. Wealth, careers, beauty, popularity and possessions will all remain behind.
The Prophet ﷺ said:
“The deceased is followed by three: his family, his wealth and his deeds. Two return and one remains. His family and wealth return, and his deeds remain with him.”
(Sahih al-Bukhari and Sahih Muslim)

This hadith often makes me stop and reflect.
When my life comes to an end, I do not want my greatest achievements to be the things I accumulated. I want my greatest companion to be my deeds—every sincere prayer, every act of kindness, every tear shed in repentance, every moment of patience, every smile given for Allah’s sake, and every hardship endured with hope in His reward.
Allah says:
“Indeed, the allies of Allah—there will be no fear concerning them, nor will they grieve.”
(Surah Yunus 10:62)
That is the happiness I seek.
Not a happiness built upon changing circumstances, but one rooted in faith, contentment and certainty that Allah’s promise is true.

As I continue this journey, I ask Allah to purify my heart from every disease that distances me from Him. I ask Him to protect me from pride, envy, arrogance, hatred and especially riyā’—performing acts of worship to be seen or praised by people rather than seeking His pleasure alone.

The Prophet ﷺ warned us about this hidden danger, saying:
“The thing I fear most for you is the lesser shirk.” They asked, “What is the lesser shirk, O Messenger of Allah?” He replied, “Showing off (riyā’).”
(Musnad Ahmad)

May Allah make every action we perform purely for His sake.
May He grant us hearts that are content with His decree, tongues that constantly remember Him, and souls that find peace only in His worship.

May He make us among the people of Jannah, forgive our shortcomings, accept our good deeds, and allow us to meet Him with hearts that are sound.
Āmīn.